Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm experimenting with sincerity
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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