the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
