I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
