just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize