Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
