It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
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what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
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My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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