Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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