If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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