I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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