what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
