i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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