He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize