before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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