It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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