I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
