she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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