She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize