Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize