I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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