her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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