Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
