now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Holy sore nipples Batman
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
