Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
