Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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