He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
