i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize