I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
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