She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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