woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
