Texts From Last Night

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  (386): View more from Florida

  That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.

  (954): View more from Florida

  Apparently hers is a theme park.

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  (386): That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground. (954): Apparently hers is a theme park. http://tfl.nu/yoy4
  Replies (8) Good night (1121) Bad night (2104)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"

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  (780): she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!" http://tfl.nu/mre5
  Replies (13) Good night (4697) Bad night (1139)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.

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  (610): i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window. http://tfl.nu/q9w7
  Replies (24) Good night (5125) Bad night (1322)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.

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  (917): half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country. http://tfl.nu/tafy
  Replies (262) Good night (20686) Bad night (2203)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...

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  (512): Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not... http://tfl.nu/1rqn
  Replies (36) Good night (931) Bad night (7197)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz

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  (740): I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz http://tfl.nu/789h
  Replies (10) Good night (2035) Bad night (957)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.

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  (330): Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in. http://tfl.nu/l5u1
  Replies (8) Good night (3704) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.

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  (780): Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something. http://tfl.nu/bxdz
  Replies (7) Good night (1251) Bad night (900)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  What do you wear to apply at a strip club?

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  (734): What do you wear to apply at a strip club? http://tfl.nu/ttz5
  Replies (17) Good night (2280) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.

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  (479): It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule. http://tfl.nu/n9xy
  Replies (5) Good night (530) Bad night (1272)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.

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  (336): He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it. http://tfl.nu/p4ei
  Replies (6) Good night (838) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist

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  (412): I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist http://tfl.nu/c6mv
  Replies (5) Good night (764) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.

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  (613): That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover. http://tfl.nu/as9t
  Replies (1) Good night (765) Bad night (274)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink

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  (817): If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink http://tfl.nu/nuwv
  Replies (1) Good night (668) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21

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  (443): You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21 http://tfl.nu/iggm
  Replies (1) Good night (495) Bad night (379)

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