so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
