I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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