I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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