i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
How drunk are you?
Completed.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
