goodnight i made you a song goodbye
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
