i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
