don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
In other news, I just burned my penis
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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