I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
My vagina is officially offended.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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