i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
