Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
