Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
