I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
there was a trapeze. enough said
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
