Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
