last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize