We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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