So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
