I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
