what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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