This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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