five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
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How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize