just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize