So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Randomize